Deer in the headlights

The idea I should start a public blog came from the NEED to remain productive now that I no longer have classes. In typical find the answers in the wind fashion I listened to the little voice that said... write, that's the first step.

BUT

I've had bloggers block since starting ruminations - my very first public blog - and which to date consists of recycled posts from my private blog. As of now, I am certain no one is reading, but the idea that a complete stranger may stumble upon my ruminations has made me stop to consider "what would I like a perfect stranger to see of me?".

Now that I've subdued bloggers block and am scratching the hell out of it with my pen, I'm contemplating what I want out of my blogger experience and I've decided I would like to share and find kindred spirits.

In that vein, I've been known to draw a thing or two. I always want to draw, always. My everyday processes are always peppered with images, and questions about what I want to say, and how to say it. I have never found an answer, but the need to draw/paint/create now and again spills into what I refer to as "in the meantime" creations. Artistic accidents that happen when I just HAVE to put pencil to paper, or create a form... arrange words... create SOMETHING or else destroy or self destruct.

The thing about in the meantime is what comes out is never anything I've ever imagined, or ever understand, but it's always right. The movements and lines flow out in a rush of sweet relief, and I am always surprised at what I've created.

I usually end up giving away whatever I create because it's not what I imagined; but the more of these pieces I create I come around to the idea that perhaps I will never think a piece from concept to paper, and I may never be able to explain what the images represent. Maybe MY art will always be what happens when I step to my medium in faith and allow those lines to flow from me.

Here is my most recent endeavour. A few months ago I imagined charcoal against brown paper and ripped a piece off and tacked it to my closet door. Here's the hasty drawing and experiment with media - charcoal, sharpies, and watercolour.
I've applied oil pastels since - a medium I have not worked in in a long time, so it's touch and go how it will turn out. I will post pic of my progress later.